Vrhunac duhovnog iskustva i doživljaja za mene dogodio se dan prije darshana u Splitu, na neočekivan način, kako i priliči božanskom iskustvu koje nije nikad ono što mi očekujemo, ili na način kakav mi očekujemo.

Usred viroze koja me intenzivno “sastavila” već dan ranije, nisam namjeravala ići na satsang sa Paramahamsom Swamijem Vishwanandom, predviđen za taj dan, misleći da je pametnije da pokušam prizdraviti do darshana. Međutim, moja gošća iz Austrije, koja je doputovala sa kćerkom radi darshana, bila je toliko nestrpljiva i entuzijastična, sa stavom da bi, ako treba i četveronoške dopuzala do tamo, samo da ne propusti jednu takvu priliku… i jednostavno me zarazila sa svojim entuzijazmom…

I tako smo krenuli, ne znajući da je let bio odgođen. Čim smo stigli ispred vrata centra, preplavila me već poznata aura, atmosfera i uzbuđenje koje se osjeća uvijek na darshanu i u živoj prisutnosti Majstora. I dalje ne znajući da On nije uopće tamo, ušli smo unutra, a mene je zapljusnuo takav val ljubavi, kao da se val razlio kroz mene… I okrenula sam se mojoj gošći u uzbuđenju i rekla… tu je, tu je, ovo On upravo pjeva!

Međutim, nikako nisam mogla vidjeti odakle On to pjeva i gledala sam kroz gužvu ne shvaćajući gdje On to sjedi… i tada sam nekoga pitala i rekli su mi da nije tu i da dolazi tek sutra… onda mi nije bilo jasno odakle Njegov glas i pjevanje, pa sam pokušavala vidjeti po zidovima koju to snimku ili prijenos puštaju, i opet pitala nekoga… ali su mi rekli… nema snimke, ovo ovdje pjeva Swami Kanjalochana!

Puno sam puta čula Swamija Kanjalochanu kako pjeva, ali ovo nije bio on! Moj um je bio blago rečeno u zbunjenom stanju, kao da me netko zafrkava “vidiš ga, a ne vidiš ga, čuješ ga, a ne čuješ ga!”

To se sve dešavalo u jednom trenutku, i u tom istom trenutku događala se nevjerojatna eksplozija ljubavi… na koga god mi je pogled pao, sve drage ljude koje tu poznajem, bila sam ganuta do suza videći toliko ljubavi u njima, ta ljubav je bila na trenutak sasvim vidljiva..toliko sam bila ganuta tom njihovom ljubavi, i bilo mi je sasvim jasno da je božansko prisustvo potpuno tu, potpuno u svakom aspektu prisutno u punoj snazi darshana. Shvatila sam da sam došla na darshan. Shvatila sam da upravo primam taj darshan kroz oči svake te osobe u koju sam pogledala… I pala mi je odmah na pamet ona Isusova poruka na odlasku, zadnja poruka apostolima nakon što im se pokazao nakon uskrsnuća…” volite jedni druge kao što sam vas ja volio”. 

To je ono što nas oni uče, to je ono zbog čega se utjelovljuju. Ta ljubav o kojoj oni pričaju, to je stalno oko nas… taj Bog i Guru za kojim toliko čeznemo i proganjamo ga i čekamo, On nije tamo negdje, gdje se sad trenutno utjelovio, On je stvarno u svakom biću, i ako osjetimo ljubav prema čovjeku, prema prijatelju i suputniku na ovom ponekad teškom putu koji se zove ljudski život… to je predaja Bogu i darshan.

Ono što me najviše ganulo, bila je ta spoznaja koliko mi svi to želimo… koliko smo gladni te ljubavi, i koliko je iskreno nekad osjećamo..i tad se samo otvorimo i pustimo sve… zaboravimo i oprostimo sve i sebi i drugima, i jednostavno budemo sretni, budemo u ljubavi.

Samo ću još reći da mi se ovaj uvid ponovio i na darshanu slijedeći dan, kada sam bila obuzeta svojim brigama i umom i unatoč tome što je ovo bio “pravi” darshan, onaj koji se dogodio dan prije je bio “praviji”! To mi je samo potvrdilo spoznaju, pokazavši mi da je do mene. Možeš sjediti doslovno kraj Božjih stopala dan i noć… ali ako nisi u srcu… uzalud je!


Bog je u nama. Guru je u nama. Bog i Guru je u dragim ljudima. Ne čeka On da se mi “popravimo” da bi nas nagradio svojom ljubavi. On nas voli sad, takve kakvi smo, bez iti malo osude. I mislim da je naš jedini posao da naučimo tako voljeti jedni druge. Sada. Usred nereda koji jesmo, usred ovih mana i vrlina… sada je već sve savršeno. 

– Sandra

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My Darshan with Paramahamsa Vishwananda in Split -10 December 2018

For me the culmination of spiritual experience and impression happened the day before the Darshan in Split, in an unexpected way, how it suits divine experience which is never what we expect it to be, or in a way we expect it to happen.

In the middle of virosis which intensively took a hook on me one day earlier, I did not plan to go for a Satsang with Paramahamsa Sri Swami Vishwananda, planned for that day. I was thinking it is wiser to get well till the Darshan. But, my guest from Austria, who came with her daughter to the Darshan, was so impatient and enthusiastic, with an attitude that she will, if it is needed, go there kneeling, just not to miss such an opportunity…and she simply infected me with her enthusiasm…

And so we went there, and we did not know that the flight was cancelled. When we arrived in front of the Bhakti Marga Centre, I was overflown with a well known aura, atmosphere and excitement which you can always feel at a Darshan and in the personal presence of the Master. And not knowing that He is not there at all, we came in, and I was flushed with a wave of such love, like that it… flushed through me…and I turned to my guest in excitement and said…here, here He is, He is just singing!

But, I could not see in any way from where He is singing and I was looking through the crowd and I could not understand where He is sitting…and then I asked somebody and they told me that He is not here and that He is arriving tomorrow…but I could not understand from where His voice was singing, and I tried to see on the walls which video or livestream they are transmitting, and again I asked somebody…but they told me: “There is no video, Swami Kanjalochana is singing!”

A lot of times I have heard Swami Kanjalochana singing, but this was not him! My mind, mildly said, was in a confused state, like somebody eas teasing me, „you see him, you do not see him, you hear him, you do not hear him!“

All that was happening in a moment, and in that same moment an unbelievable explosion of Love happened…whom I looked at, all dear people I new there, I was moved to tears seeing so much love in them. That love was in a moment completely visible…I was so moved by their love, it was completely clear to me that the Divine is completely present here, completely in every aspect present in full power of Darshan. I understood that I came at a Darshan. I understood that I was just receiving that Darshan through the eyes of each person I looked at…and in my mind appeared a Jesus’ message when He was leaving, the last message for the apostles after he appeared in front of them after resurrection, ‘Love each other like I loved you.’

That is what they are teaching us, that is why they incarnate. That love about which they are talking, is all the time around us…that God and Guru which we desire so much and pursuing Him and waiting for Him, He is not somewhere there, where in this moment He incarnated now, He is really in every being, and if we feel the love towards a man, a friend or a companion on this sometimes hard path called human life…that is surrendering to God and Darshan.

What was that moved me the most was the insight how much we all want this…how much we are hungry for that love, and how much we sincerely sometimes feel it…and then we just open ourselves and let go of everything…we forget and forgive everything and ourselves and others, and we are simply happy, we are in love.

I will just say that this insight repeated on the Darshan the next day when I was absorbed in my worries and mind, and despite this being the „real“ Darshan, the one that happened the day before, was „more real“! That only confirmed my cognition, showing me that this is up to me. You can literally sit next to God’s Feet day and night…but if you are not in your heart…it is in vain!

God is inside of us. Guru is inside of us. God and Guru is inside of dear people. He is not waiting for us to „improve“ so that He then rewards us with His Love. He is loving us now, the way we are, without any judgment. I think that our only job is to learn to love each other in the same way. Now. In midst of the mess that we are, in midst of all defects and virtues…everything is perfect already now.

– Sandra

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